This was a badly done sketch at 11 at night, but the reason why I post this today isn’t to impress artists, or anyone. it’s just to vent. You see, I found out today that i just lost my cousins. They ran away with their mom. The only ones I liked. The cool ones, that I could talk to confess weird shit to them. We liked each other, and we were not liked by the other “cousins.” They were my family.
But the worst thing is that I lost my extended family. I could have never related to the others around me, but the oldest two, they were my friends as much as they were my family. I mean, wherever they are, I know they are safer from their insufferable father. But I didn’t even get the chance to say goodbye, I mean, leaving impulsively happens, and it was best they left. But they aren’t, for a good reason, coming back. I don’t even have their facebooks or anyway to contact them to make sure they’re safe.
I could go on about how I made one of the last of my old friends pissed off, but I honestly I don’t care to write another sentence about her.
I am very scared, and right now, my closest friends are online. On the internet. I got some friends at school, I’m not saying I’m lonely, but really, it’s odd that most of my closest friends are the people I haven’t met in person.
I am trying not to. I am really trying to stay as optimistic as I can, but I can’t seem to fix anything I touch. I just break it. Friendships, relationships, it breaks. I just want someone to tell me it’s going to be okay, because for the half year, it hasn’t been. I’ve been bottling up what has truly happened to me and I just let it go today, resulting in some very pissed off human beings.
And also, some very kind and sweet people who are telling me the more I find myself, the more people will come, and the more beautiful my art will become. I thank you all for those lovely comments.
But as I learned today, because no one expects the optimist to be the one breaking down the fastest.
You can do it girl. You have many that love you. More than you can imagine. :) <3 Im rootin for ya